The Day My Body Quit Before I Did: When Trauma Shuts You Down

 

When the Body Breaks Down what the Heart Can't Hold 

There were days I would wake up tired. Go through my morning tired. Sit in silence — still tired. No matter how much I rested or how early I went to bed, the fatigue never really left.

At first, I thought something was physically wrong with me. Bloodwork, supplements, caffeine — I tried everything. But the exhaustion wasn’t something I could sleep or supplement away. It wasn’t just in my body. It was coming from somewhere deeper.

It was grief.
It was trauma.
It was the weight of everything I was carrying — unspoken, unprocessed, and unrelenting.

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Grief Is a Full-Time Job (and Then Some)

Grief doesn’t just make you sad. It makes you tired.
Because it’s not just emotional — it’s physiological.

When we experience loss or trauma, our nervous system shifts into survival mode. This is what’s often called the fight, flight, freeze, or fawn response. It’s our body’s way of protecting us. And while that response might be helpful in the short term, staying there for too long is draining.

Your body wasn’t made to live in constant alertness. Eventually, it starts to shut down in an attempt to conserve energy. That looks like:

• Brain fog

• Chronic fatigue

• Trouble focusing

• Difficulty sleeping or wanting to sleep all the time

• Feeling numb, disconnected, or emotionally “flat”

“My soul is weary with sorrow; strengthen me according to your word.”
— Psalm 119:28 

Even the psalmist understood what it means to be soul-weary — a weariness that touches your emotions, your body, your ability to think straight.

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Why Trauma Drains You

Trauma (especially unresolved trauma) causes your brain and body to operate on high alert — constantly scanning for danger, even when you’re technically safe.

Think of it like having an alarm system that never turns off. You’re not consciously aware of it all the time, but your body is. That low hum of internal vigilance burns energy, even if you’re just sitting still.

“Hope deferred makes the heart sick...”
— Proverbs 13:12 

When grief goes unacknowledged or trauma remains untreated, the body carries the cost. You might find yourself asking, “Why do I feel like I’ve run a marathon just from living?” That’s because, in many ways, you have.

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You’re Not Lazy — You’re Human

Let me say this clearly:
You are not lazy. You are not weak. You are not making this up.
Your body is responding exactly as God designed it to — to protect, to conserve, and to survive.

But you were made for more than just survival.

Healing begins when we stop pushing ourselves to “get over it” and start honoring what grief has done to our bodies and minds.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
— Matthew 11:28 

Jesus doesn’t say, “Come to me when you’re back to normal.”
He says, “Come to me when you are weary.”
And He offers rest — not just for your soul, but for your whole self.

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Rest Is Holy, Too

Sometimes rest isn’t a nap or a vacation. Sometimes it’s:

• Saying no without guilt

• Letting the dishes sit in the sink

• Crying instead of powering through

• Talking to a therapist

• Taking deep breaths and allowing your nervous system to settle

• Reading Scripture with no goal other than comfort

“In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength…”
— Isaiah 30:15 

There is strength in stillness.
There is healing in listening to your body instead of ignoring it.

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If You're Always Tired…

Please know this: the weariness you feel is not a moral failure. It’s the aftershock of a heart that’s endured more than it was ever meant to alone.

You’re not broken. You’re just carrying too much.

But the One who holds the universe is more than able to hold you, too.

Let Him.